Lesson 2: The Rules

The first and the last of George Washington’s “Rules for Civility and Decent Behavior in Company and Conversation” pretty much capture the spirit of the other 108.

Number 1 is “Every action done in company ought to be with some sign of respect to those that are present.” Number 110, “Labor to keep alive in your breast that little spark of celestial fire called conscience.”

The document applies these to all sorts of situations and circumstances such as business and recreation, meals and other social gatherings. Many rules are very simple such as not eating with your mouth full or interrupting when others speak.

As I implied previously, I was drawn to study them for two reasons. The first was awareness of how many are being broken in our public life today.

  • Number 47: ‘Mock not nor jest at any thing of importance.”
  • Number 49: “Use no reproachful language against anyone, neither curse nor revile.”
  • Number 21: “Reproach none for the infirmities of nature, nor delight to put them that have in mind thereof.”
  • Number 22: “Show not yourself glad at the misfortune of another, though he were your enemy.”
  • Number 73: “Think before you speak, pronounce not imperfectly nor bring out your words too hastily, but orderly & distinctly.”
  • Number 41: “Undertake not to teach your equal in the art himself professes; it savors of arrogance.”

Donald Trump blatantly breaks these constantly, and his followers cheer when he does.

The second reason I was attracted was the rules originated with Jesuit monks. Most people believe religion motivates civility. Many of the rules advocate the humility befitting God’s people. You don’t pretend to be better than others. You take the lower seat at feasts. You work on yourself before you criticize others. You avoid self- deception. You maintain integrity.

In fact, many could be regarded as interpretations of the Ten Commandments. Number 108: ‘When you speak of god or his attributes, let it be seriously & with reverence. Honor & obey your natural parents although they are poor.” Others counsel not bearing false witness against your neighbors or coveting what they have.

If you want to read all the rules yourself, they can be found here:

I come away thinking the loss of civility in public affairs is a religious matter. Christians s should be doing all they can to restore decency. I hope to offer some suggestions on how to do that in the next few weeks.

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